


Come Around Again

by SnowStormSkies



Category: Tokio Hotel
Genre: Challenge Response, Gen, Revelation, Twins, twinship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-22
Updated: 2012-03-22
Packaged: 2017-11-02 08:45:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/367127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowStormSkies/pseuds/SnowStormSkies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bill sat shoulder to shoulder with him, put an arm over his shoulders and waited for Tom to come around to him again. </p><p>-</p><p>Because sometimes you come to realise something really really big and scary and it turns your whole world upside down. It's nice to know that there'll always be a twin there, waiting for you to finish your breakdown, even if they don't quite understand <i>why</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Come Around Again

**Author's Note:**

> **Title:** Come Around Again 
> 
> **Author:** SnowStormSkies 
> 
> **Pairing(s):** None. Gen. 
> 
> **Rating:** K/G. All safe for everyone. 
> 
> **Disclaimer:** Don’t own, don’t sue. Using them for fun, not real, making no profit, promise to put them back when I’m done~ 
> 
> **Warnings:** Just some incredibly deep feelings from Tom, even though he’s like six.
> 
>  **Summary:** Bill sat shoulder to shoulder with him, put an arm over his shoulders and waited for Tom to come around to him again.
> 
>  **Challenge:** From this prompt of the September 2009 FQF – 36. baby!twins The first time Bill and Tom realize that not everyone gets to have a twin. gen (submitted by cyberdigi)
> 
>  **Author's notes:** I’m sorry. It just spoke to me for some reason and I had to write it. I know it’s already been filled once, but I hope I’ve taken it in a significantly different direction as to make it wholly unique. Original Fill can be found here: It's a pretty damn good read.

  


** Come Around Again**

 

Tom was six when he worked it out; that not everybody has a twin.

It was a complete revelation. Blew his mind. Boom. Head shot. Made the world go sideways. So much so, he had to sit down in the middle of the playground on his way into school and stare at his hands, at the painted lines between his knees, study his shoes very intently as he struggled to come to terms with the fact that _not everybody has a twin._

Bill had, of course, sat beside him, ignoring the spotting rain and the teacher who ordered them inside before they got sick and even Mama when she doubled back from dropping them off at school because she’d had a motherly instinct that something had gone wrong. She had a lot of those. None of that mattered to his twin, and Bill sat shoulder to shoulder with him, put an arm over his shoulders and waited for Tom to come around to him again. 

But Tom didn’t know how to come around again. He was lost. Drowning. Confused in this ocean of understanding that he’d suddenly been cast adrift on. 

How did people live without a twin? How did they cope, how did they make it through the day without another person by their side like a twin was?

Bill was his other half, his everything, his world. When Bill was happy, Tom was happy. When Bill was sad, Tom was sad. When Bill hurt, Tom hurt, and that meant that Tom had to be the older twin and fix things so Bill wouldn’t hurt anymore and then Tom wouldn’t hurt anymore and everything would be okay again. When Bill was picked on by the other kids, Tom took it upon himself to wrap his twin in his arms and extend his protection and repeat his promise to _never ever ever leave Bill_ because that’s what twins did. 

When Tom was dreaming, he’d feel something in his head and then there would be this _sensation_ of **Bill** and Tom would feel their bond strengthening and he’d dream _with_ Bill. When Tom was lonely, Bill wouldn’t even have to be in the same room and he’d just _know_ that Tom needed a Special Bill Hug, and he’d walk right in and give him one. It was a very special hug, where Bill wrapped his arms around Tom and pushed his chin into that little hollow at the side of Tom’s neck and then _pushed_ with his mind so all that Tom could feel was the feeling of _them_ and _twinness_ and _Bill_ all around him and inside of him and outside of him, and then Tom wouldn’t feel so alone anymore. 

How did people get through the day without that? 

How did they manage to deal with being scared of the dark without a twin to lie next to them and hold them tight against the threat of the monsters in the closet? 

How did his _mama_ get through the day, when her mind was so lonely without another person’s to circle around it, pushing and building and repairing at walls and defences and precious memories and feelings that Tom was probably too young to understand but he _felt_ so much?

He felt so scared, so lost in this new understanding. He pushed his face into his hands, and whimpered because this was new and scary and was this what being a grown-up meant? 

He didn’t like being a grown-up. It was _horrible._

Their teacher kept touching him, pushing at his shoulder, coming between him and Bill, trying to get him to talk to her but Tom _couldn’t_. He just had his world blown wide open by this revelation, that lots and lots of people were so very lonely in the world and what he and Bill had wasn’t just special for them, but for everyone and he was so frightened by the knowledge that he couldn’t deal with other people right now. 

Mama, his wonderful _lonely_ Mama, just told Mrs Brockov to stop touching him and to let them deal with this. Mrs Brockov was a butthead though and didn’t listen until Mama stood up and took her away for a _talk_ which was grown-up speak for loud arguing. 

Bill just curled around Tom’s shoulder and cuddled him so close that Tom could feel his twin’s heart beating near his own, and the heat from his brother’s body leached into his own, sharing his warmth without regret or thought for himself. Inside his mind, Tom felt Bill _press_ himself as close to Tom as they’d ever been before, so much so that the division between Tom and Bill was the most blurry that Tom had ever felt it in his life. 

It felt right. 

It felt like home. 

Like he was closer to being complete than he’d ever been before and so many feelings that he didn’t understand, couldn’t understand until he was older and wiser and more experienced but he could feel those emotions and trust in them and he was so happy and scared and awash with all sorts of conflicting feelings that he felt tears well up in his eyes. 

Bill just smiled and looked at him with eyes that shone with something so pretty that Tom thought they looked like stars and said, “I’m here.” 

And Bill was. He was around Tom’s body, and his mind, and his soul, and his heart so much so that Tom thought he would burst from all the love and feelings that he was having right now. Even though he was crying, and he didn’t quite know why, he knew that Bill was _there_ for him. Every step of the way, every breath, every night and day that Tom got to spend on this Earth – Bill would be there. He was as much a part of Tom as Tom was a part of Bill. He’d never be lonely, never truly be without his other half, never actually be without someone who loved him. 

He pressed a hand over his heart, where Mama told them that love came from and he felt it pulse in his chest in time with Bill’s. Perfect time, they marked it together. When Bill breathed in, Tom did and it was in perfect symmetry. Bill raised his hand and Tom raised his and their small, childish hands met in the rain and Tom felt like he couldn’t be happier. Ever. 

Over by the swings, Mama turned around and looked at them, and even though her make-up was running down her face, and her jumper was all baggy and covered with paint, Tom knew that she wasn’t sad to not have a twin because when she smiled at the two of them in the middle of the playground, her whole face was wide open with love and joy for them and Tom thought she might not know what a twin felt like but she had two sons and that must be something similar.  

And in the middle of the playground, in the torrential downpour that was so very cold, Tom sat beside his twin and realised that while not everybody had a twin, _he did._

It was so beautiful, so amazing and perfect that he tipped Bill and himself over onto their backs and laughed and laughed in the face of the rain and the thunder and the rolling clouds and beside him Bill did as well because he felt the joy that Tom did even if he didn’t understand why but he knew it was a good thing to laugh with Tom. They giggled and laughed so hard that it almost hurt but it was perfect and so very them that when Tom looked over at Bill, to see a face that was his own but _not_ staring back and him he knew right then and there that everything was going to be _just fine._ He kicked up his feet with the joy that ran through him and smiled and laughed even though he was crying at the same time and he didn’t care because... 

He had a twin. 

He had a _twin._

  
  
  
  
_\--_

**Author's Note:**

> So here are some pictures for your viewing entertainment. Young, lovely twins. 
> 
>  


End file.
